Calloused Hands and Long-Suffering Beauty
Written by Chelsee White
Would you see beauty in hands that are rough and calloused or teeth that are discolored and broken? This is a description of Maartje, the first woman Selina met in High Prairie. These are not exactly enviable traits, and neither is the difficult, work-frenzied life of Maartje. Selina certainly isn’t attracted to it at first, and who can blame her? The life of a farmer’s wife is thankless and unkind at times.
Fast-forward 30-something years, and Selina embodies some of the same qualities Maartje had. Yet, true beauty isn’t skin deep, and an easy life isn’t a precursor to a beautiful one. Selina clung to the words that Maartje had once shared with her, “You can’t run away from life.” Selina’s life did not pan out the way she envisioned, yet with each twist and turn, she didn’t run away from it; she buckled down and confronted it. She wrestled and persevered in such a way that her hands, too, became calloused. Her work was relentless, but through it all, she never lost the ability to appreciate life and see its beauty. Ironically, just as fire doesn’t turn pottery into ash but instead makes it stronger, the trials made Selina’s character admirable and beautiful.
As I read So Big, I realized that Selina’s ability to see beauty was a choice she made. It was not just luck, as it would have it, or a superhuman gift she alone was endowed with. We all have the choice to choose love and beauty regardless of our circumstances. Sometimes we don’t see the beauty right away because it is hidden underneath the muck and grime. Saying “yes” to those things that are hard and sacrificial, to the twists and turns we didn’t expect, to the grueling work that, at face value, doesn’t appeal to us — perseverance in these things is what will yield a beautiful life.
The paths Selina takes and the choices she makes lead her down a road that, like Maartje’s, leaves her hands rough and calloused. There are many disappointments along the way. She works at a grueling pace, but she perseveres and works selflessly while never abandoning beauty for convenience or ease.
Unfortunately, she wants something different for her son than she herself has. She hopes that he can encounter beauty without toil and long-suffering, but her hope is in vain. Only later does she realize that it was through the toil and long-suffering that she received the reward she sought, and that her son would have to go through them as well. True beauty isn’t cheap, easy, or convenient. It wouldn’t stand the test of time if it were. It is refined through trial and hardship, love and virtue. Reflecting on Selina’s life, I am humbled. Humbled because I, too, have been one to fight against life at times, only to later realize the very things I fought against were the things that refined me the most.
Like the asparagus Selina planted, it can take years for the harvest to come to fruition. Time is essential to cultivating anything worthwhile. Habits are not broken in a day; a good marriage is not fortified in a year; children are not raised in a decade… why do we think we can become who we were made to be overnight? It is through the trials that we are made beautiful, not in spite of them, and this beauty is often hidden until the time of harvest, when it is finally made ripe for the harvest. We do have a part to play in this transformation: we must surrender to what God has planned for our lives and choose to see the love and beauty that surrounds us. We will reap what we sow. If we persevere to the end, we will have something even better than Selina’s affirmation from Roelf; we will hear the words, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” and reap the reward of eternal life.
About Chelsee White
Chelsee White is a wife and homeschooling mother of seven children (on earth). She is a Catholic convert of thirteen years and will forever enjoy basking in the richness and depths of the Catholic faith. She discovers Christ most in her daily vocation as wife and mother. In addition, reading good books has been to her a portal that ushers her from the natural world to the supernatural by encountering the transcendentals, the timelessness of that which is true, good, and beautiful, in what she reads.
About Well-Read Mom
In Well-Read Mom, women read more and read well. Our hope is to deepen the awareness of meaning hidden in each woman’s daily life, elevate the cultural conversation, and revitalize reading literature from books. If you would like to have us help you select worthy reading material, we invite you to join and read along with us. We are better together! For information on how to start or join a Well-Read Mom group visit our website wellreadmom.com
