Time Out for Friendship
Written by Marcie Stokman, Well-Read Mom Founder and President
This blog post was adapted from the Well-Read Mom Year of the Friend Reading Companion.
Once, I volunteered at Miracle Field, a baseball program for kids with special needs. One day, while assisting some kids with Down syndrome, I experienced a privileged moment of friendship. Stepping up to the batter’s box, fifteen-year-old Noah eyed his friend Matthew, who had just arrived to watch the game. Without a moment’s hesitation, Nathan dropped his bat and headed to greet his friend.
“Noah, come back. You’re up!” the coach yelled. But Noah was determined! At the fence, the boys executed their secret handshake and high-five. “You two must know each other,” I commented. “Noah’s my best friend,” Mathew chimed. Both boys looked at me with smiles. Then I realized they were waiting for me to join in on a three-way high five. Just like that, I was invited into their friendship.
Why friendship? When you really think about it, almost everything that is good, true, and beautiful in life is better through friendship.
“Noah, come back, it’s your turn!” the coach shouted. The game continued, but in the midst of this 30-second time out, I was changed. In that moment I had a privileged glimpse of life through another lens. Noah’s priority was not succeeding in baseball; it was acknowledging his friend.
He took time out for friendship. It is my hope in Well-Read Mom that we take time out for friendship too. Why friendship? When you really think about it, almost everything that is good, true, and beautiful in life is better through friendship.
As we read together, we can ask, “What does it mean to be a friend? What does friendship have to do with my relationship with Christ? In what ways do I resist deeper relationships?”
A friend of mine, Fedi Fromm, wrote, “Friends are those who are on the road of life with me, who accompany me in my daily toil of discovering what it means to live my life for something great. It’s because of friends who do not let me settle and who challenge me that my heart is awakened and educated. Thus, life has the possibility of being a great and beautiful journey. This is why I read, this is why I belong to Well-Read Mom, even though I definitely do not fit the profile of a ‘well-read mom.’ I follow because of a friendship with people who love my destiny.”
Another friend, Marcia Otto from Houston, writes, “Who is a friend? A friend is someone with whom I share the thirst for meaning, someone who helps me walk, someone who reminds me what my heart is made for.”
At the baseball game, Noah and Matthew reminded me what my heart is made for: to love and be loved. Friendship isn’t convenient. In fact, it often can be perceived as an interruption or a time out from our life’s real work.
Taking the time to read good literature and meet for Well-Read Mom isn’t convenient either. It requires a decision and effort. But that effort is rewarded with a growing capacity for attentiveness and an increasing space in our hearts where the invisible becomes visible. Through all of this, we begin to see a deeper dimension in reality.
It is my hope that Well-Read Mom is a place where friendship is born and nurtured. Like Noah, who dropped his bat to greet his friend, we are challenged to drop our laundry baskets, to-do lists, and especially our phones for a while. When we take time to read great books and accompany one another, we take time out for friendship.
About Marcie Stokman
Marcie Stokman, M.A., is founder and president of Well-Read Mom, an international movement and book club. As a former clinical nurse practitioner in mental health and longtime homeschooler, she writes and speaks to encourage women and share the power of reading. She and her husband, Peter, have seven children and 20 grandchildren. Marcie is the author of The Well-Read Mom: Read more. Read well.
About Well-Read Mom
In Well-Read Mom, women read more and read well. Our hope is to deepen the awareness of meaning hidden in each woman’s daily life, elevate the cultural conversation, and revitalize reading literature from books. If you would like to have us help you select worthy reading material, we invite you to join and read along with us. We are better together! For information on how to start or join a Well-Read Mom group visit our website wellreadmom.com
