When Following is Freedom
Written by Susan Severson
I have been blessed, truly blessed, to have been a small part of Well-Read Mom since its infancy. When I was a brand new mother, I met with Marcie in a little run-down cafe to talk about her new idea. I was instantly intrigued by what she called “Well-Read Mom” because, although I had only been a mother for about three months at the time, I was already feeling the stagnation that only constant conversation about diapers, baby milestones, and Play-Doh recipes can bring. When Well-Read Mom began, I was all in. Hooked. I jumped in headfirst to my group and read each book with excitement. Which is why it may seem odd that last year I intentionally gave up reading a single Well-Read Mom book.
I don’t really know what drove me to make the decision to abandon Well-Read Mom’s booklist. Perhaps I was feeling like a rebel lacking freedom. Or just wanted to have complete control over at least one thing. I just remember telling my group that I would still come to meetings for the snacks and the laughs but that I was going to read whatever the hell I wanted. You see, I don’t have a problem with picking up a book. In fact, I’m usually neglecting my children to read just “one more page” (I’m not saying I’m proud of it). At first, it was great. I was reading what I wanted, when I wanted and just indulging myself.
As with every decision, there are consequences. Of course, it was still lovely to attend my group meetings. I could sip tea and nibble on the best of treats…but I was noticing how much less satisfying it was to not be able to participate more deeply in the discussion—to not be able to contribute anything that could tie into the book being discussed.
An unforeseen consequence, however, was that I began to notice the unique and beautiful gift of each of the women in my group in a new way. I noticed how each one grappled with tough themes. I noticed their differing viewpoints on a variety of subjects. I was moved to see their hearts laid bare when they earnestly dove into the work that was being proposed and that they were willing to share that bare heart with me!
I guess that if I had read every book, I might not have shut up enough to be able to notice these things about my fellow readers. About halfway through the year, I also noticed that I was sad to finish a book of my own choosing and not have anyone to sit down and share it with. Needless to say, once Spring rolled around, I was happy to be back on the wagon (just in time to hang out with Kate in East of Eden!).
I need people. I always have and always will need people—and there is true freedom in following something proposed in love.
Susan Severson, Well-Read Mom Member
We are a lonely culture that values “being rebellious” over true, deep happiness and fulfillment. It’s kind of baked into the cake at this point, and I’ve found myself having to consciously decondition from this “self-reliant” mentality. Really, it all boils down to pride, yes? But truly, I need people. I always have and always will need people—and there is true freedom in following something proposed in love. This year, I have read each book with diligence. Not every book chosen has been my favorite, but I have judged all of them to be a boon for my daily life and worthy to read and discuss. I am grateful to Marcie and for this invitation to lie down my weapons of self-destruction.
As Bernard Berenson put it so eloquently: “Literature in its most comprehensive sense is the autobiography of humanity.” I believe this to be true, and if this is true, it makes my emotionally-driven philosophy of last year silly, albeit educational. Sharing literature within a community has been a more profound experience of freedom than being a rebel has ever done. Now, excuse me, I must get back to reading Brother Lawrence, who, strangely enough, speaks of community, dependence, and freedom…400 years ago! Happy reading, sisters.
About Susan Severson
Susan Severson is a wannabe saint, a homeschool slogger, a sometimes-but-wants-to-be-all-the-time writer, and a mother to four little rapscallions. Prayers are welcome. She resides in Crosby, MN.
About Well-Read Mom
In Well-Read Mom, women read more and read well. Our hope is to deepen the awareness of meaning hidden in each woman’s daily life. We long to elevate the cultural conversation and revitalize reading literature from books. If you would like us to help you select worthy reading material, we invite you to join and read along. We are better together! For information on how to start or join a Well-Read Mom group visit our website wellreadmom.com
