Spiritual Direction Through Books
Written by Kathryn Heim
If I could figure out a way to recommend books to people as a profession, I feel like I would have my life made. I don’t mean writing book reviews for a mass audience. I mean that I would like to sit down with you as a person, talk about your likes and your interests, your life experiences, the pace of your reading, your personal goals and desires, and then be able to recommend books tailored specifically to you. I want to join you on your journey through literature, through stories, through life.
Because books are a personal and unique experience for each person, that experience is as unrepeatable as each individual soul. The books that are meaningful to me aren’t necessarily going to be as meaningful to you, no matter how “good” a piece of work is. We are going to respond to books in different ways at different times in our life, in different stages and seasons.
This has become especially apparent to me as I have journeyed with different women through Well-Read Mom over the last several years. Sometimes a certain book is just too heavy for the season of life that we are in, but sometimes we might need that depth and reality to help ground us as we’re seeking for something more. Some of us are already deep readers, ready to devour the likes of Virgil and Dante. Some are still new to this level of intense reading and need books that will let them just dip their toes a bit. Some themes speak loudly to certain people, and sometimes one might need to dig a little deeper to find that theme in their own life.
I once listened to a group lecture given by a priest who specialized in spiritual direction, and he discussed the problem of trying to give spiritual direction en masse. Yes, there are certain universal truths that can be expounded upon and general recommendations that can be made. But in the end, spiritual direction is a very personal matter, because our spirits, our experiences, and our lives are each unique and unrepeatable. A good spiritual director won’t just rattle off the same advice to everyone who walks through the door; a good spiritual director will listen, and let themselves be guided by wisdom and by the Holy Spirit to what the person before them actually needs in that moment.
I’ve been reading with Well-Read Mom for seven or eight years now, and, especially during the first few years, I definitely did not read or finish every single book. Sometimes I just didn’t have the time, sometimes I didn’t have the interest, and sometimes I just wasn’t in the right season to accept what a book had to offer. I’ve had to work on my own receptivity, on being open to lessons that I may not be looking for. In the years since I first started with a group, I’ve gone from being single to getting married to becoming a mother for the first time; my perspective, my priorities, and my openness to receive grace has undergone quite a lot of change in the last decade.
Reading these books selected by others has helped challenge me to grow in my own habits, my intellectual life, and my spiritual life, and it has been such a gift; and the gift of these books is one that I’ve become passionate about sharing with others.
When someone asks for a book recommendation, it’s one of the biggest thrills for me, but to me it’s also a more complicated topic than they often realize. What have you already read? What do you like? Are you looking for a challenge or just something for fun? Why do you read? Are you willing to probe some heavy topics?
In Well-Read Mom, the beautiful and well-crafted Reading Companion does an excellent job providing guidance on the books we read together. Out of necessity, these books are chosen for a wider audience than just you as an individual, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t still benefit from the broader themes and topics discussed. Just as spiritual direction is best one-on-one but we still have spiritual classics and practices that are widely recommended for a reason; so there is also a reason for lists of the Great Books, and popular commentaries to help guide us through them. Good books are Wisdom speaking to us over the ages; they are an opportunity to seek counsel from the greatest minds humanity has known, if only we are open to their advice.
I wish I could sit down with you over a cup of coffee and act as a guide through the pilgrimage of reading great literature; I wish I could encounter you as a person, body, mind, and soul, and discuss not only the words contained in books but the Word that permeates creation. But even if we can’t all meet in the flesh, I’m grateful that our minds can still meet through sharing the same stories, seeing the same Truths, and bringing our unique perspectives to the larger conversation of life and culture.
About Kathryn Heim
Kathryn Heim is an author, wife and mother living outside Salisbury, NC, where she gardens, raises chickens, experiments with cooking, and reads too many books. Find her work at www.kathrynheim.com.
About Well-Read Mom
In Well-Read Mom, women read more and read well. Our hope is to deepen the awareness of meaning hidden in each woman’s daily life, elevate the cultural conversation, and revitalize reading literature from books. If you would like to have us help you select worthy reading material, we invite you to join and read along with us. We are better together! For information on how to start or join a Well-Read Mom group visit our website wellreadmom.com
